I still can't believe you found somebody new. But I wish you the best, I guess.

Four months later and your memories still haunt me in my sleep.

...

He pulls up into my driveway in the dead of night and runs up the stairs of the porch to meet me. Again, he explains why we're not and why we can't be together as if to open up the wounds I've been trying so hard to close. There's only so much of it I need reiterated. Retort after retort escalates my emotions. Anger is building up inside of me and just begins pouring out of my mouth in the form of words. We fight and we argue until I can't stand his presence.

I'm standing on the porch watching him get into his car. The Volvo's engine comes to life and he quickly speeds out of my driveway. He's left me so many times already, you'd think I'd be use to it by now, but I'm not. The street becomes quiet. A little too quiet. He's gone. I turn to enter the house and I hear another car driving by. I pivot my head sideways as the sounds grows stronger. His silver Volvo is back in the driveway.

"I can't do it," he says. "I can't leave you again." He stares deeply into my eyes, but it's a trick that has long lost it's charm. He grabs me by the arms and pulls me closer. He tells me that he misses me - how he's always missed me. That leaving me was a mistake and an even bigger mistake that he left me for her. That even though he tried to forget me, he couldn't. That he never really meant to hurt me and was really just trying to give me time to grow. Lies. As intoxicating as they have been to hear, that's all they were.

I took a step a back and held him at arms length away.

"If you had meant anything you ever told me, you wouldn't have done what you did."

There he was. The only man I wanted to be with asking me to take him back. Tears begin filling my eyes. As much as I want(ed) to be with him, there is no second chance. Not in his case. I'm standing on my porch staring into the face of the person who meant so much to me and just took it for granted. His hazy silhouette bathed in the moonlight was the last of him I saw before waking up.