"Since hate troubles the soul, do not cherish jealousy. Avoid people who make you unhappy."

I've just finished deactivating my Facebook again. It's a temporary hiatus I think I strongly need. You see too much of things you don't want to see. You learn to much of things you wish you didn't know.

I've always disliked how I was told that I should dress better or look prettier. That it wasn't because I didn't look good, but because I didn't look great. I disliked how I was told that perhaps I just needed to wear more eyeshadow or a little more eyeliner and some blush to contour my cheekbones.

At the time, I didn't wear a lot of make up because I found it tedious and I enjoyed walking around with the little amount I had on. I didn't want to begin feeling that I need make up in order to be beautiful. Nor did I dress to the 9's each single time I went out. If an occasion called for it, I would dress a little better than I normally would. I didn't feel that one's outward appearance was necessarily a reflection of themselves. It could have been a reflection of a part of themselves, like who they are or how they feel on a lazy day or when the sun is shining it outside, but not the person in their entirety.

If you meet me on a good day, chances are, I'll look better than I would on a day where the sky is gray or if I just came back from the gym. This is why first impressions are always almost false. There is what you think, what people want you to think and reality.

I've really been trying to change. By change I mean finding my own style and working with what I have. With that said, I'd just like to point out that I'm not defined by what I own or what I wear. These changes are not a consequence of earlier putdowns, but a step forward in who I am. I'm still searching for myself but I'm very close to finding her.

Who I was a couple of months ago is different from who I am today. Yes, it took me a while to get here, but here I am. From here, it'll only get better.

CLICK: Another Unkept Secret
I've become the person you wanted me to be, but who I wasn't, until now. I like her and I think you would have too, but your patience just couldn't afford to wait.