"You know what would make me really happy right now? If you got hit by a truck and died."

I was walking around a bridal boutique and was approached by a sales associate. She asked me what type of dress I was looking for and when I was getting married. For some stupid reason, I lied and said, "I'm getting married next June. I really like the Pronovias and Manuel Mota dresses. I know it's a little expensive, but I simply fell in love with the dresses the moment I saw them." Come to think of it, only the former was a lie. She then proceeded to ask me what I wanted the dress to look like. Lace, beading, sweetheart neckline, a-line cut.

Next thing you know, the entire store is helping me plan my wedding. I have someone choosing the groomsmen suits, someone choosing the china, someone finding a photographer and videographer, someone looking for a party bus - you name it. As great as it all was, I didn't know who I was marrying - nor did I get to try on a dress.

When I stood near the entrance of the boutique, I heard a man screaming as if he were being tortured. I ran to the door to see a crossing guard getting run over by a truck. If that wasn't bad enough, the driver put the truck in reverse and ran over him again. The crossing guard died.

P.S. I don't wish death up anyone, that title is a line from the movie "Mr. Brooks." It came into my head as I was typing the last part of my crazy dream.